New year, mula la semua orang dengan azam baru, new year resolution la katakan, padahal azam lama belum kecapi lagi... LOL...
Seriusly, aku malas nak celebrate new year actually, malas nak pikir, i just love the fireworks though, because of the colours,its beautiful... Tapi, macam bakar duit kan... Entah certain pendapat kata bazir ja, certain kata, setahun sekali jer, la yalah new year, memang setahun sekali, takkan setahun 3,4 kali kan... Tp, tuh tak kira lagi fireworks time religious celebrations, merdeka day and etc...
Tapi, bila aku pikir balik kan <dalam duk malas pikir tuh, pikir jugak la kan> new year actually dah lepas, if you get my drift... For the muslim lah...
Apa kena ngena new year dengan tema "I'm Scared!!!"???
Actually, just wanna say Happy New Year (for tahun masihi) sebagai mukadimah... Peace!!! ✌✌✌
Sekarang aku tengah study week, certain course/uni lain tengak final dan yang aku pasti medik UPM masih ada lecture lagi, hehe...
Bilamana, kawan2 lain, ambil angin, pergi dataran merdeka ( for TURUN n new year celebrations what not), pergi tengok fireworks, parades, new ceramah and all, i stay in my comfy yet berselerak with nota room, tengah study... Teringat satu poem, if i'm not mistaken berbunyi begini...
Two roads diverged in a wood,
And I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Sebab I Scared!!!
Bukan takut apa... Final minggu depan, yet, study aku masih tunggang langgang, study gaya nak tak nak, masuk ikut telinga keluar ikut mulut... You get me???
This is my second time for the 3rd semester finals, yet I'm like zero input in it... yelah aku budak mengulang, so supposedly, aku da 50% input yet I don't...
Petang tadi baru jumpa parents, and they really hoped I'm passed this semester, because the 4th semester would be hell...
Aku takut gak, well another year ends, and aku selidik balik diri aku... How is my today, is it better than my yesterdays... And is my today is good enough so that my tomorrow would be better???
Sabda Rasulullah SAW
“Sesungguhnya orang yang paling berjaya ialah orang yang hari ini lebih baik daripada semalam dan orang yang gagal adalah orang yang hari ini lebih teruk daripada semalam, manakala orang yang terpedaya adalah orang yang hari ini sama dengan hari semalam” (Hadis riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim)
Trying reflects myself... What did I learn a year ago???
Its seems like I make the same mistakes again and again... I never learnt from them, yet keep repeating them... I really need to learn them and stop making history repeating itself...
My studies, supposedly i should have study better, better than my yesterdays... I admire my friends, Luqman, Imran, Malek, Hasrul and other comrades, they learn from their mistakes... They study harder than ever... Put 120% effort in succeeding...
I still having problems with my friends, I still take them for granted... I need to appreciate them more, be more a friend, rather then used them like a tool...
Am I a better muslim, a year ago and today, is there any difference? My friends say that I'm a good muslim, in comparison with them... I beg that to differ, they are lot better muslim that I am... I think this whole time, I'm just pretending to be one rather being one... Improvement is a must...
Mesti semua orang rasa pelik ngan aku.... Why beat yourself to death, degrading yourself???
Because, I'm trying to learn from them... Rather than, making new years resolutions or what not, try repairing and admitting (paling penting) the past mistakes and improve them...
Ini tak, duk tengok apa yang baik ja, and the bad ones, the faults, the mistakes kena ignore, and then tak improve and keep repeating them...
I'm Scared... For my past mistakes... For my present... And for my future... I'm also scared for the Judgement Day... Is my deeds/pahala is enough for me to enter Jaannah??
I dreamt of entering Jannatul Firdausi, yet my deeds, my amalan, my sacrifice for Islam not even suffice to enter Darul Jalil ( the lowest level of Jaannah)
Yeah I'm Scared... But I'm scared for a reason...
I'm so sorry and apologize if this post is too emotional, if any of you readers think i should improved in anything, any suggestion and advice are opened for...
Compliments are like drugs... Taking the right dosage is good, yet it has its side effects... Taking too much or overdosed, it can poison... The same goes to comments and advise... But, comments and advise are more potent than compliments...
I need to smile more, be happy, spread good news and less worry, not sad...
Jazzakalah Khairan Khatira
never give up faiz.ganbatte!!
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